


Undisclosed Desires

by Trash_King



Category: Ed Edd n Eddy
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-22
Updated: 2013-06-22
Packaged: 2017-12-15 19:06:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/852998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trash_King/pseuds/Trash_King
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Edd is no fool. His friends have not thought favorably of his decision to step into a relationship with Kevin, and rightly so.<br/>But they don’t understand.  If only they could see what he sees in this man. If only they could see, they would probably fall head over heels with him too.</p>
<p>[An exploration between the dynamics of Kevin and Edd's relationship, told from each of their perspective.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

For all it’s worth, their relationship had been rocky from the start.  
There were too many old hurts to mend, and Kevin knows that all too well.

It can be seen from how Edd flinches away each time he accidentally raises his voice in the heat of one of their debate/arguments. It can be seen from the lowered head and constant blinking of eyes to keep tears at bay when he gets even a mark less in test results. It can be seen in the dejected slump of his shoulders and slouch in his thin frame as he holds his thick stack of books in front of him and makes his way down the hallways only when it’s clear.

Edd is still afraid. He’s afraid of many things.  
Afraid of germs. Afraid of contamination.  
Terrified of failure. Afraid of losing everything. 

The fear makes him overly anxious, overly careful. Scattered even at times. It’s paralyzing, all encompassing and insidious.  
Kevin has been there to bear witness to some of Edd’s meltdowns, and it was unbearable, watching someone you love tear themselves to pieces without being able to help them at all.

Part of Kevin feels guilt. Shame that he might have played a part in adding onto the list of factors that have brought Edd even more pain. Shame, burning and suffocating, that he had been one of Edd’s tormentors. It wasn’t fair. Eddy was the main person he had problems with, not Edd. And though they have broached this topic numerous times, even when Edd has voiced out the fact that he has forgiven him a long time ago, Kevin will never be able to fully forget or forgive his own self. 

And so, he takes it upon himself to make things better.  
Out of guilt, but also out of love, of affection and loyalty.

 

Edd is a human being, and Kevin can’t fix him like he can fix his beloved bike. But what he can do is to try, to keep him company. To remind him that he may be smart, but he is also sarcastically witty, endearing, adorable and loved. So much more. To hold his hand, embrace him as he shakes and comes apart. Keep him company and walk with him, to remind him that he is not alone anymore.

And so he does.

 

He’s gentle with his touches. Patient in coaxing Edd in trying something new, even though patience isn’t exactly one of his virtues. He waits, takes things slow. Never presses issues when he sees the first signs of panic and unease within the other’s eyes even though it’s in his nature to be straightforward. 

Like every human, Edd is haunted with discontent and fears of his own. There is a deep seated insecurity sprouting roots of self doubt and anger in his heart. Edd feels insufficient. But Kevin is here to tell him otherwise.


	2. Chapter 2

Edd is no fool. His friends have not thought favorably of his decision to step into a relationship with Kevin, and rightly so. Kevin is easily irritable, prone to temper tantrums. He has a short fuse, and won’t hesitate to get into a fight if someone as much as looks at people he cares about wrong. He’s intolerant at times and obstinate, brash even. There’s also rumors that he breaks hearts just as easily as he pleases. And finally, there was the issue of him being less than pleasant and downright antagonistic at times to them in their past encounters as children.

 

But they don’t understand. They didn’t see the man who cried and latched onto him, apologizing over and over because he was certain he ‘fu-screwed up’ everything. They didn’t see the softness in his eyes or smile because it’s reserved only for special people (him). They didn’t see the amount of attention and lengths he would go to just to see someone he cares about smile again. They didn’t see the set curve of his jaw as his eyes brimmed with determination. They weren’t the one who was there holding his hand as he spills, words of hesitancy and worries, fears. They weren’t the one who saw him at his most vulnerable. If only they could see what he sees in this man. If only they could see, they would probably fall head over heels with him too. 

 

There is no mistaking the hesitancy in Kevin’s actions sometimes. He’s overly aware and too careful, unwilling to cause Edd anymore unnecessary hurt. He teases and laughs at Edd sometimes, but he’s always careful not to overstep the line, always backs off. He knows what he is capable of doing, both the good and the bad, and he’s afraid. He’s afraid of destroying what he’s worked so hard to mend. Afraid of ruining everything because that would probably mean his end too. Kevin is afraid of himself. Of the ‘monster’ he could be pushed into becoming. Or turning into someone as twisted as Eddy’s brother.

 

Edd knows. He sees the look in Kevin’s eyes sometimes.  
And it pains him, to see the other so unsure. Like he can’t be trusted.   
Edd knows, and there is nothing he can do but offer constant assurance.

Warm embraces, voluntary touches. A tender kiss. Smiles and hand holds. Resting his head against Kevin’s shoulder and curling up fully against his side. Reminders that Kevin is no monster, that he too is worthy of love and affection as much as Edd is.

 

Their relationship is far from perfect.  
It’s still shaky and sometimes scary.  
But Edd is certain they can make it through whatever altercations they happen to be having.

Because while they are vastly different in terms of personality, the fact that they complete each other remains the same.  
Change is not something Edd is adept in handling.  
But for Kevin’s sake, he wants to try.


End file.
